My dear, sweet baby girl... I cannot believe my journey of pregnancy with you is more than half over. I'm sure because I've been so insanely busy that the time has flown faster than it does for other mommies, but it still seems extra fast to me.
One of my FAVORITE bosses (Karyn Coward!) told me when she was pregnant that one of her favorite things about it was that it her time with her babies that was all HERS! No one else knew her baby like she did during that time and she loved that. It was like a private party for two. I feel the same way with you. I love that I feel EVERY movement, even if others - even daddy - cannot. I know when you're awake, I know when you're sleeping, and I don't have to share you with anyone. I don't ever feel like I'm alone. I always have a little someone tagging along with me.
I knew in my bones that I was pregnant with you before I could even take a test that would say so. I told your daddy and your grandma, but then I thought about it more and decided that there was no way I could KNOW so certainly so soon and I kind of talked myself out it because I didn't want to be disappointed when I tested and it was negative. But the day I did, even though it was a faint +POSITIVE+, it was +Positive+! Then I got SO sick for what felt like SO long and thought - just once - "I'm never doing this again..."
The faint, BUT +PoSiTiVe+ testS! :D
What I looked like the day I KNEW you were there!
The day you popped! It was Super-bowl Sunday and it was like - the day before, I wasn't showing and then I woke up and I was! :D Such a fun feeling!
The picture that we took (a billion times to get right! lol) for daddy for Vamlumtimes (I'll explain when you're older... lol) Day!
But here we are, 6 weeks later and I know that you are my little girl and I'm at the best part of pregnancy where I'm NOT sick, I'm NOT uncomfortable (Yet...) and I feel so energized and full of, well, Life! I can't believe how much I love you already. I see you on the ultrasound machines and I'm just bursting with pride for my little baby. I feel you kick me and I can't believe that we, me and daddy, made you. You have part of each of us and our families and I can't wait to see what you look like, sound like, act like... You already do little things that make me think, "Oh, she's stubborn like her daddy." Or "Ah! She's a night-owl like mommy!"
Having fun with daddy, painting your room!
Your first flowers from Daddy that he left on table for us to find after work this morning. He loves us very, very much!
There are times that you kick me and it's like you're saying, "Hey! Mommy! I'm here!" The other night at work, I'm not entirely sure what you were doing, but it felt like you were grasping your little fists in my uterus like you were tickling me and it literally made me giggle because it was such a funny feeling. Last night you must have needed to stretch like I do when I'm waking up because I had the most bizzare, pushing feeling up under my diaphragm.. It was like you couldn't get comfy or you were waking up and needed a really good stretch because I'd lean back and stretch myself out as much and I could and you'd relax a little, and then I'd lean back over my desk and you'd do it again. I love feeling all of this!
Much as I'm loving all this time with you, I still cannot wait until you get here and I get to hold you in my arms and see your face, hold your hands, and see your daddy look at you for the first time. I'm scared my heart might burst, but I look forward to discovering a new love that only mothers before me know and have.
I love you, sweet Scarlet, with all my heart and soul, and I cannot wait to meet you, baby.
All my Love Always
~ Mommy ~
~ Mommy ~